Continuing from Part 1.
How Refusing to Review the Hard Numbers Kills Your Financial Future
The dismissive statement “well, that’s the truth as you see it” is a red flag. It indicates several problems.
First and foremost is the disagreement as to the starting place of the group before the endeavor, a clear sign that two major players have very different perceptions of the initial as-is situation.
Second, it says that someone is willing to dismiss contrary information because their opinions trump anyone else’s facts. “Well, that’s your truth” turns into “I don’t have to listen to your warnings, instructions or whatever because I’m so right relative to you”. It also puts the project at risk when one person applies different standards for performance and acceptance to their work than everyone else, based on their own opinion.
When it comes to personal finance, this type of dismissive statement kills your ability to plan. “Honey, we can’t afford to be wasting money on X!” met with a disrespectful “I don’t see it that way!” attitude prevents an honest discussion of the family’s finances.
When someone tries to talk about the numbers in the budget or growing debt load and is met with “That’s not a problem!”, or worse, “That’s your problem, not mine” is dealing with someone who will not deal with reality. And that person certainly can’t solve the problem if they won’t admit the issue.
You do have to take the time to collect the data and hard evidence to be able to solve personal financial problems. Yelling about someone overspending after seeing them come home from a shopping trip could lead to them hiding the purchases.
The real solution is pulling out the credit card bills, sending the children next door, and totaling up how much money is spent on clothes, eating out and other things that lose value or have no lasting value.
Only when someone has the numbers about how all those lessons for the kids, the splurge trips to various destinations or “spare” vehicle in the driveway cost them X dollars per month or drive the family X dollars per month deeper into debt will they change the behaviors that are 80% of personal finance.
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